Dear readers,
Observations and Symptoms, 9/13/2013
The major purpose of this blog is to record milestones in my
medical journey. Altho several friends
continue to ask how I feel, or “what’s going on?” I assume most folks really
don’t want to know all the gnitty-gritty.
For those that do want a peek at what it feels like to be me right now,
I offer the following, with apologies if it borders on TMI. People say that I
look really good, but that probably has more to do with the fact that I haven’t
had to face the really noxious chemo that some people have to do. Perhaps the
most prominent symptoms relate to my ongoing feeling of drowsiness, and my
reduced capacity to focus or concentrate mentally. This is accompanied by a general lethargy and
reluctance to get up and “do what needs to be done.” Once provoked into action I can function OK,
but not necessarily with desired prowess. This is frustrating, especially on
the golf course, or at the computer, but I try to prepare myself for such
outcomes. For example, I’ve not broken
any golf clubs through anger, or lofted any clubs into high branches of nearby
trees. But am I acting maturely? You won’t get an answer here, but I still have relative command of a colorful vocabulary.
My balance is ok also, but I do use the rails on steps for
balance, especially in poor light. My
strength has diminished but again is ok for most tasks. In this regard I am limited mainly by the
fact that I have developed over the past year a hernia which cannot be
repaired because of the anti-cancer
medication I’m on, Avastin. The
medication acts to limit the formation of new blood vessels so any surgery is
out unless mandatory since Avastin would hinder the healing process.
There have been no recent changes in vision, but since the
original beastie was in an area of the
brain responsible for visual processing there were early changes which have not
lessened. Most prominent is about a 25%
loss of peripheral vision on the left side.
This creates blank spots, but it also slows down my ability to pick
things up quickly (visually, that is). For
example, it’s not always easy to follow a golf ball off the tee. Of course (as in the old joke) I need to work
on remembering where it went even if I do see it. Face recognition can still be an issue, both
recognizing a “known” face and putting a name with it. Again, this has been with me from the
beginning and is not something new. I’m
sure it would not take much effort to get me lost in the woods either. I am able to read, although it can tire me
also.
Being completely open here, I will note that I have had
several small events in the last couple weeks, that the doctors refer to as
‘auras.’ These are generally described
as mini-seizures which can accompany a real seizure. In my case a real seizure has never occurred. For
me it has been a sudden tightness in the esophagus and perhaps light-headedness
and a strange taste sensation, accompanied by a feeling of nasal dilation, All of which pass in just a few minutes. We have eliminated some medication which
might have been responsible, and have back-up plans for more anti-seizure
dedication if the events continue. The next MRI is scheduled for Friday the 20th, so we'll get more info on the ferrets in the cranium in the following week.
